Can you help a girl out?
I'm speaking on insignificance in the next month and how those feelings may affect us in our relationships to Christ, our family, friends and those we're meant to serve.
Which leads me to my question: What have feelings of insignificance lead you to do or not do ?
You can leave the comment anonymously if you'd like.
I'll give you one of my mine to get you started.
There was a time in my life where feelings of insignificance lead to me making poor fiscal choices and I maxed out 3 credit cards. All in the hopes of 'fitting in'.
So, what about you? Have you ever made a poor choice in order to boost your confidence or to help you feel like you 'fit in'?
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6 comments:
I still battle those feelings of not fitting in when around adults. I can get into a room of youth or children and be myself and have the time of my life...but around adults I am always feeling judged. Not that they are judging me. It is just my selfishness. It keeps me from fellowship and serving. It's like if you are going to stick me with adults..then forget it...I'm not going to help.
Those feelings have led me to have unhealthy relationships with men.
so i came over to read this after you mentioned it on your fb page. your blog is looking especially girly today-pink and ribbons and all. i always feel out of place reading it. . . but i like what you have to say so i struggle through hahahahah
i remember a situation that had long-term consequences. i had gotten job at JE Dunn Construction after my freshman year of college. making good money for the time - like $12/hr in 1982. i was a laborer, just doing grunt work for the steel worker named - and this was what he said his name was and what we called him - "Rocky Raccoon." biggest toughest guy i had ever known to that point. he was even an ex-con. for some weapons charges he said.
i was in a pretty good place spiritually, too. was summer staff at EBC working with jr high kids. attended and/or led several Bibles studies.
anyway, first day on the job, i worked really hard for Rocky. wanted him to like me. he seemed to, we laughed, worked, he told me prison stories. . . seriously. end of the day, he said "new guy buys the beer." i had not been a drinker AT ALL up to that point. God had been faithful to keep me from it all through high school and my freshman year. but in that moment, trying to win Rocky Raccoon's favor, i gave in, went and bought a case of beer for the guys on the site. i think it was Pabst Blue Ribbon cause that seemed like the kind of beer construction workers would drink based on my vast knowledge obtained through TV commercials.
anyway, i bought it, i drank it, and that really was the tipping point for me on a very long downward spiritual journey and an extended period of unhealthy self-indulgence and sin. i mean, i didn't wind up in the gutter, i just became the classic partying college guy, binge drinking and all the things that went along with that back in the 80's.
God has been faithful and He redeemed me from that bad decision and revealed Himself to me in a big way. but that's another story, this is the story about a poor decision i made to help me fit in, and it's consequences lasted for years.
I think Satan has won the battle when it comes to stay at home moms thinking they have to "do something more" or spend significant amounts of time in "ministry" away from their children in order to feel significant. I have to repeatedly tell myself, this is enough, you are right where God wants you to be and God has given you these children as your ministry. It is hard to think of "just" being a devoted wife and mother as something of significance.
Feeling insignificant as a teenage girl whose own father didn't desire a relationship with her led me to grab onto the first man who said all the right things. That led me down the path of marrying the same guy...and that led to 10 1/2 years of being in a loveless marriage with an addict who had no concept of fidelity. That in turn, circled me right back to feeling insignificant, but on a much grander scale. God's grace... obedience can really be so trying, but through it, His blessings have been amazing.
You all blessed me today with your open honest testimonies. Thank you for sharing your stories with me!
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