It all began Wednesday evening at choir practice when our Worship Pastor asked me to participate in a video tape series of short segments for an some upcoming sermons our Pastor is doing.
Let me say right up front, that I KNOW I'm irrational-let's just get that out of the way. Moving on to the unique insight that is the inner workings of my brain, I don't mind being up in front of people for teaching Bible study or singing on the praise team. In my mind, I can't really be seen-we're focusing on either study or worshiping. This case would be different. I DO NOT enjoy having my picture taken at ALL! So, while our Worship Pastor was asking me, in my mind I was saying-I don't think so, that is way worse than a picture and there certainly isn't time to lose 50 lbs. before Sunday. But, at the same time I was thinking those thoughts, I could hear the Holy Spirit (no not audibly) saying, " Yes, you are going to do it". Ok, Ok. Yes, I'll do it.
Thursday I began thinking about what I would like to say and when in all the craziness shaping up in our weekend, I could get my hair cut and colored. Let's just say, there might be a few, gulp, gray hairs poking through. So, I had some time carved out for Friday night.
When God said NO. Can you believe it? No, just like that! He's never really spoken to me about my hair before ( although, goodness knows I would like for Him too!) so why, WHY was He starting now??? Now, is when I needed to look as good as possible. Since I didn't have time to lose the 50 lbs, having good hair was supposed to distract from that!!
I would like to say, that I said "Of course, Lord! Have your way, I'll do whatever you want me to do!" Instead the conversation went something like--WHAT? I can't do WHAT? Why! WHY! WHY! You've never cared before, why would you care now???
It wasn't pretty folks, I'll admit, I threw a fit! So much so, my hubby asked what was wrong ( he was baring the brunt of the attitude problem.) Of course, I said the ever popular, 'Nothing'! I mean who is admitting that they are arguing with God about their hair???
Well, Saturday night, when I'd stopped whining enough to listen, God told me why He'd chosen this road for me this week.
And, are you ready for this?? Because, it's not about me! (Say What?!?) My testimony, the things He asks me to do for His name sake, are for Him and Him alone. My vanity, and seriously that is ALL this week was about, was getting in the way of the mission- telling others about Jesus being the Lord of my life.
I pray the next time He asks me to something, I can get out of the way faster, not put up a fuss and just say, Yes, Lord!
And for the record, I don't think God is against highlights-PTL!
I'll be getting some next week, and it's Ok, I have permission.
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