Monday, April 25, 2011

Not Again

This afternoon one of the boys and I had a conversation about homework.
Let's just say we've had this conversation before. Twice this year, in fact.
I am tired of having this conversation and basically told him so.

My son understood my level of frustration, apologized and we moved on.
At least on the outside.
On the inside I was still a bit annoyed and frustrated.
The internal dialog I was having was something no one needed to be subjected to.
It lasted for about 30 minutes, until I heard that still small voice saying to me:
"Don't you and I have the same conversations over and over?"
"Haven't you repeatedly needed to learn a lesson more than once?"

Yes. The answer to both those questions is a loud and resounding Y E S.
So why the major frustration with my child? Because I want him to be different then me? Because his poor choices reflect poorly on me? Because his poor choices make more work from me?
Perhaps it's all those things.
And God, my heavenly Father could say all those things about me too when I make a mistake-even if it's the third time.
But, never once has he said NOT AGAIN to me.
He's only bid me come to the cross and ask for forgiveness.

So, instead of unleashing the internal Mom lecture that was raging in my head, I chose grace.
Not looking the other way or not disciplining, but grace filled discipline.

And not just for him, Oh, that I would spread that out to others as well. That I would pass out grace as much as I do frustration and indignation.
It's difficult at times, but if I my goal is to reflect my Saviour then I've got to do it in all areas.

No matter what I've done, what you've done, He doesn't say Not AGAIN-he says "Come unto me . . ."
Thank You Jesus!


Tonya said...

Thank goodness He doesn't treat us as we do our kids!

Angie said...

Amen to that!

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