Friday, December 14, 2012

Lessons in Humility

If you asked me what strongholds I tend to struggle with most, my answer typically would be;

fear, control, self doubt (has a lot to do with fear).

Pride isn't something I would say I necessarily struggle with, except of course, fear and control as so much to do with pride don't they?

Yesterday was a day I got some lessons close up and personal with humility.

My day began by going for an interview for a part time retail job.

(No, this isn't my ideal or dream job but we've got some hefty medical bills sitting here that just
plum need paid)

I walked in fully confident I'd be leaving with a job.

That didn't happen.

They needed me to be available on Sundays and I said not possible.
They politely showed me the door.

After that I ran to the grocery store. I've needed to go for a few days now and have just not had the time.  I try and only go twice a week so as it is my cart is overflowing and the extra days and it was crammed FULL.

As I began to unload my cart the lady in line behind me began what I thought would be a nice chat.

I was wrong.

'Boy your cart is really full.'

Yes, it sure is, I've got three kiddos at home I'm trying to kept fed (insert smile here).

'OH, are they all as fat as you?'. . . .

Time seemed to stop.

I could feel my face become red as I felt the heat rise.

I was so embarrassed.

The  only thing I could think to say as I looked down, no longer making eye contact with her, was

'Would you like to go ahead of me?'

She said yes.

I kept unloading my cart, as the sound of my heartbeat filled my ears.

So humiliating.

Needless to say, my afternoon was filled with many many thoughts and frankly a few tears.

Felt a bit like a loser at some points.

One of my primary thoughts though  was this:  I'm so glad I know who I am in Christ otherwise that could really bring a girl down!

But, as I laid my head down on my pillow last night, I found myself thanking the Lord for pointing out my pride and letting  me practice humility.

I truly believe He lets us have tests until we can pass them.

I hope yesterday brought me a step closer to passing, because let me say those test were NOT FUN.

However, the opportunity to reflect on Scripture that tell me who I am in Christ and how my value can never be determined by my job status or dress size. . .

well that part was pretty awesome.

Whatever difficult thing you find yourself going through today, lean on Him, trust Him.

Jesus is the only way we'll make through this mean world.

Oh, and never forget you have no idea what turmoil someone went through just trying to buy groceries for their family.
Let's be extra kind today.

Blessings from the trenches,

1 comments - Add Yours

Anonymous said...

You're beautiful inside and out.

Post a Comment