Friday, April 12, 2013

Facts and Feelings

Feelings or emotions are such tricky things.

At least they are for this girl.

I tend to feel things deeply.




You name it and I tend to not feel it just on the surface, but down to my core.

Which can be a good thing.

God made me an emotional girl, and often He uses those emotions to accomplish His will.

Sometimes, though I let them control me . . .

and when that happens. . .well, it ain't pretty.

There are times I have to decide- am I going to believe this feeling I have or am I going to believe the facts.

Tricky waters to navigate.

I had a pretty big event I was overseeing this weekend and because of an incident that

happened at the end, I'm having trouble  processing that anything good happened.

People are telling me it did, but I can't see it.

Do I trust the facts being told to me, or do I go with my bruised feelings?

Frankly, I'm still processing that one. (I hope my honesty doesn't frighten you. If you're looking for someone who has it all together, you'll have to keep looking because she's not here.)

What about when I'm watching my children struggle with their health?

The many waiting rooms I been in waiting for a diagnoses or surgery progress report. . .

Do I go with my feelings of worry and dread, or do I go with the facts.

The facts that God loves my children more than I could, that He promises He has a plan for them and it's to prosper not to harm. A promise that all things work together for good for those who trust in Him.

In those quiet moments what am I going to believe?

Saying goodbye to friends who's time on this earth seems much much to short.
Watching friends grieve for parents who still had some much life to live.

What am I going to trust? Facts or feelings.

When my timetable doesn't look like His.
I want an answer, I want visible action.

Do I trust my feelings? Or do I trust the facts that my only job is to trust and obey.

So tricky.

So very tricky.

I would like to say that I trust the facts more than my fickle heart, but that is so often not the case.

So, what do we do when feelings overwhelm us and the facts become clouded by our unbelief?

Well, you know I'm just an ordinary girl, not a theological scholar so maybe there is a deeper answer, but for me, in those times I drop to the floor and pray. . .

I pray; for faith when it's hard, for obedience when it's difficult, for forgiveness where it's needed, for love to overcome anger and bitterness, for the courage to walk by faith and not feelings, for discernment to  know what's really from the Lord or from my fickle heart.

And in moments of doubt, I pray it all again.

And then, even when I don't feel it, I live it anyway.

I practice it even when I don't want to. Even when my feelings say, you have a right to be angry, you have a right to hide away, instead I keep praying right through the tough stuff of life.

Then the next time something comes up where it would be so much easier, and frankly even outwardly make more sense, to trust my feelings over the facts it becomes more natural to trust the facts instead of the feelings.

Because, really when I'm trusting the 'facts', I'm trusting Jesus.

Jesus, Jesus How I trust Him
How I've proved him or'er and or'er
Jesus, Jesus Precious Jesus
Or for grace
to trust Him more.

Walking by faith not by sight, until we see fully one day in heaven. . .



Diane said...

Oh how much do I love your writings! And how much do I struggle with these same feelings! LOVE your writing - "for love to overcome anger and bitterness" - shouldn't that be on the lips of every believer? Love to overcome - such an action to take - to mentally and physically take the act of obedience as it says in His word - to actually practice and acknowledge LOVE over everything else. Excellent post, my friend, excellent post and excellent reminders!

Unknown said...

EXACTLY where I am. I even catch myself wishing I didn't feel anything anymore because I am tired of being controlled by my feelings, my ridiculous, over the top, crazy woman feelings.

Angie said...

Thank You Diane!

Love over all. . .easy to say, not always easy to practice.
Your encouragement means so much to me!

Angie said...

Oh Laura, you make me laugh even when you're not trying to!
Praying we can find the balance between 'crazy woman feelings' and honest fact+feeling lives!


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