Cheerleaders and Trophy's

   Fall schedule is in full swing at our house, and I'll bet it is at yours too.

We were so excited when our church offered, for the first time ever, an Upward Soccer and 

Cheerleading opportunity this year.

At first I thought both of our younger kids would pick soccer, but the princess heard cheerleading and 

saw shinny pompoms and that was it-we had one soccer player and one cheerleader.

Which really was alright by me-I'm all for a cute uniform, complete with giant hair bow and 

of course the POMPOMS. 

Last Saturday was our first game.  Sisters hair was curled, uniform pressed, bow placed just so on

top of her head.  I'm know I'm just we bit biased  -but she looked adorable.

We were running just a bit behind, so I didn't stop and take a picture, thinking I could do that once 

we were there-maybe even a cute action shot-I could post on Instagram  and share the social media 

heck out of it.

We caravanned to the soccer fields, and Sister was in the car with my folks. . .and my mom being the 

amazing rock star grandma that she is, had packed a goodie bag for each kiddo, complete with a 

thermos of hot chocolate.

You can probably guess what happened next.  

Sister opened her thermos in the car, spraying hot cocoa all over her very WHITE cheerleading skirt.

Yes, we were 10 minutes away and her outfit was already ruined.

I would like to tell you that when she got out of the car I handled the situation with grace.

But, that would be a lie.

I was not happy with her.

Of course, I didn't 'yell'. . .we were in a church parking lot full of people.  I just discouraged and

demeaned through gritted teeth.  

(That last sentence was difficult to write, but it's the truth. There were several 'what were you thinking' and 'I can't believe that you just did that' being tossed about.)

She was devastated and I was aggravated.

No Instagram worthy photo now.

How will others see how cute and adorable she looked today?

That's when it hit me.

I was embarrassed.  

Yes, I was embarrassed others were going to see my daughter show up

with a stained skirt.  What would think of a mother who couldn't even wash her daughters

skirt? 

 I was aggravated I wouldn't get to post a picture.

(I hope my pettiness isn't shocking you. This is just the truth and there is really no way to sugar coat it to make me look good.)

That's when it hit me.  I was upset of what others would think of her and me. And if I'm truly, deeply

honest more me than my dear little one.

At halftime I apologized and asked her to forgive me, and because she really is a precious girl, she 

did so immediately.

But, it's left me with this thought since Saturday: "Am I rearing children, or am I polishing trophy's?"

Because you see, I truly believe that's what our children can become to us if we let our  pride

and arrogance take over.

We want athletic super stars,  leads in the play, academic achievers. And not only do we want them-

we want to tell everyone about them.  After all those accomplishments aren't just theirs-they are ours.

And, in some ways that's true -right?

That 100% on a spelling test, we helped drill those words.

Those Bible verses learned for AWANA-we helped with that.

But, we don't get to polish our kiddos and put them out on the self for everyone to walk by and oh 

and ahh about what great parents we must be because of the touchdown they scored, the hat trick in 

soccer or the award winning art project they just won a blue ribbon for.

My children's accomplishments and failures are theirs.  Theirs to learn from, theirs to find joy in,

theirs to own.

Life is messy and kids aren't perfect- and sometimes you show up to your first game with hot 

chocolate on your skirt.

And you know what? Life doesn't end.

In our American culture it's a battle we must face everyday.  . .am I rearing children who love Jesus, 

love others or am I polishing trophy's -shiny objects that never helped anyone?

More often than not, the battle is inside of me, but it's a battle worth fighting.

Fighting with you,